What's Available to me in Scilly?
The Isles of Scilly Community Safety Partnership (IOSCSP) work with all of the other agencies that are involved with persons who are, or who have been, victims of domestic abuse. This cuts out any delays and allows those who need help to receive it quickly.
The IOSCSP has recently subscribed to a new strategy to wards helping those suffering from domestic violence, which is called the Sanctuary Project. This project enables victims to feel safer in their homes.
This would secure all access points and may even include a 'safe room' that you can lock yourself if necessary. This room would have a secure method of communication with the police for just these types of emergencies.
The Community Safety Officer can become involved at anyone's request and will provide a full home security survey. This can only work once the abuser has left the house. In order for us to be able to do this, we must place the abuser under an injunction that would forbid them from going into your property. Don't worry if your abuser's name is integral to the tenancy agreement of the property, as their actions may have voided their rights to tenancy under the Isles of Scilly Housing Association and Devon and Cornwall Housing Association guidelines. This is subject to the perpetrator being found guilty in a court of law.
Devon and Cornwall Constabulary's strategy on domestic violence always puts the victim first and working in partnership with those who specialise in this field gives us a greater understanding of the needs and concerns of the victims.
The police also have a specialised mainland based domestic violence officer who is very skilled in helping victims. The safety of those being abused is at the very forefront of our thinking and so we never compromise your safety during the process of contacting you (if you wish to be contacted).
Getting Help
There are many people waiting to help you, they are working in your community now and ready, willing and able to come to your aid.
Firstly, you must let someone know you are experiencing domestic violence and secondly, you must also want to stop it.
For many, the Internet is the first place they try to get information from. We recommend that you visit the the Women's Aid website at Domestic Abuse Support
This site has a very prominent facility on the front page that allows you to 'cover your tracks.' This is advised if you are worried that your abuser may try to find out what you have been looking at on your computer. By using this tool and following its instructions, your visit will be deleted from the computer memory. If an abuser has access to your email account, he or she may be able to read your incoming and outgoing mail. If you believe your account is secure, make sure you choose a password he or she will not be able to guess.
If an abuser sends you threatening or harassing email messages, they may be printed and saved as evidence of this abuse. Additionally, the messages may constitute an offence. For more information on this issue, contact your local Police.
This is how you can clear your history on the computer:
- Netscape: Pull down Edit menu and select Preferences. Click on Navigator and choose Clear History. Click on Advanced, then select Cache. Click on Clear Disk Cache. On older versions of Netscape pull down Options menu. Select Network Options, then select Cache and click on Clear Disk Cache.
- Internet Explorer: Pull down View or Tools menu. Select Internet Options. On General page, under Temporary Internet Files click on Delete Files. Under History click on Clear History.
- AOL: Pull down Members menu. Select Preferences. Click on WWW icon, then select Advanced. Purge Cache.
This information may not completely hide your tracks. Many browser types have features that display recently visited sites. The safest way to find information on the Internet if you suspect you are being monitored would be at a local library, an Internet Cafe, a friend's house or at work.
Local Services Available to Help You
Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) The Guildhall Penzance TR18 2QR Telephone: 01736 365438 Fax: 01736 330420 Email: bureau@penwithcab.cabinet.org.uk Penwith Citizens Advice Bureau offers an outreach service on St. Mary's, Isles of Scilly. They are available in the Garden Room at the Parish Church on the first Monday of each month between 9:45am and 2:45pm. (They will try and give advance notice of any possible changes regarding Bank Holidays)
West Cornwall Womens Aid (WCWA) Helpline, Outreach & Counselling Service for women and children fleeing/experiencing domestic violence and abuse PO Box 94 Penzance TR18 2XP Telephone: 01736 367543 Helpline: 01736 367539 Monday to Friday 10:00am - 3:00pm, 24 hour answer-phone messages
Penwith & Kerrier Victim Support Telephone: 0845 056 7999
Independent Domestic Violence Advocat (IDVA) Penwith & Isles of Scilly Supporting women who are/have been experiencing domestic abuse. Offering confidential information and advice or helping through pracital/legal options available. Monday to Friday 9:00am - 5:00pm. Anna Onslow Telephone: 01736 356251 Mobile: 07828 315199
Devon & Cornwall Constabulary Domestic Violence Unit PC Elaine Trethowan & PC Gill Collins, Domestic Violence Officers - Penwith & Isles of Scilly Telephone: 01736 356253 or 01736 356251 Domestic Violence Unit Main Office - 01209 613350
National Services Available to Help You
For Men:
www.mensaid.com
www.hiddenhurt.co.uk
For Women:
www.womensaid.org.uk
For Children:
www.thehideout.org.uk
Considering Leaving Home
You Have a right to be Safe
Have you experienced the following from a partner or ex-partner?
- Verbal abuse
- Enforced isolation
- Withholding of money
- Actual or threatened physical violence to yourself or your children
- Sexual assault
These are examples of domestic abuse. Domestic abuse is often the most violent and controlling behaviour used by a man against his female partner or ex-partner. It may also occur in other close adult relationships and anyone being victimised this way can get help.
You Are Not Alone
In a crisis your safety is vital. If you are thinking about leaving, remember the following:
- Money, Bankbooks, Credit Cards;
- Benefit Books;
- ID - Birth Certificates;
- Keys - House/Car/Office;
- Passports/Visas;
- Driving Licence and Registration Documents.
You Will Be Taken Seriously
- Mortgage Documents/Rent Book;
- Insurance Documents;
- Toiletries and Medication;
- Address Book;
- Bottle, Milk, Nappies and favourite toys for the kids;
- Spare Clothes;
- Items of Personal Value, e.g. photographs.
You Can Get Help
What is Domestic Abuse?
The common definition of Domestic Abuse is 'any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial or emotional), between adults who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality.' It is often accompanied by degradation, humiliation, deprivation, systematic criticism and belittling.
The Home Office acknowledges that Domestic Abuse includes culturally specific forms of harm that impact on black minority ethnic women and which may, among others, include forced marriage, dowry related abuse, female genital mutilation and honour-based domestic abuse.
Abusers will make lots of excuses for their behaviour, often telling you that they were drunk, stressed or depressed and that they just lost control.
Often, following an assault, they will tell you that they love you and cannot live without you and that it will never happen again. They may even tell you that they will even take their own life or yours and the life of the children if you leave them
They will attempt to blame you, deny that they are abusive and lie about the sequence of events.
Domestic abuse takes many forms. Here we have listed just a few examples to give you an idea of the different types of abuse.
Aspects of Physical Violence
- Punching
- Slapping
- Kicking
- Throwing objects
- Biting
- Spitting
- Burning
- Scalding
- Choking you
- Tying you up
- Hurting your children
- Pushing downstairs
- Stabbing
- Pinching
- Locking in or out of house
- Force fed or starved
- Not allowed to use the toilet
- Not allowed to wash or bathe
- Forced to sleep on the floor
- Not allowed to use sanitary protection
- Poisoned
- Dragged by the hair
Aspects of Financial Abuse
- Withholding money
- Checking your receipts
- Taking your money
- Running debts in your name
- Not allowed to use the telephone
Aspects of Emotional Abuse
- Telling you no-one would believe you
- Mocking
- Telling you that you are stupid, fat, ugly or too thin
- Telling you that you are rubbish as a mother, wife, father, human being
- Telling lies about you
- Shouting at you
- Threatening you
- Humiliating you in public
- Threatening your children
- Stalking you
- Isolating you from family and friends
- Refusing to let you go out alone
Aspects of Sexual Abuse
- Forcing you to have sex
- Forced prostitution
- Forced to watch or mimic pornography
- Sex in front of others
- Sex with other men
- Sex with other women
- Sex with animals
- Criticism of body
